Monday, June 30, 2008

The way of life

I hate it when people break their promise. But over the years, I learn to accept that this is actually a fact in life, where human beings are just prone to this behaviour. However, I still felt annoyed whenever this “thing” happens to me, although I learn not to overact when it happens.

There are a lot of little human behaviours that pissed me off occasionally. I’m not very sure what the reason is, but I guess it has to do with the fact that I’m a woman. A human being that is emotional. Yes, I admit. I am emotional. Not only am I emotional, I’m a dreamer too (A lunatic dreamer that is). Which means I like to fantasize and had this little fairy tale story wane around some facts in life, making them more bearable, making them lovelier, and making them me-like.

However, as I grew up, this world turns more realistic day by day. And those things that are being shield away from me are slowly re-surfacing from every possible source. I don’t like it, but I HAVE to accept it. It’s what they call GROWING UP. And growing up is not fun at all. Hmm.. Maybe growing up is not such a suitable word. Becoming mature is more appropriate. The harshness of life, the unfairness of life, the ugliest of life, and the reality of life, had indeed made this world a not-so-beautiful world to live in. And whose fault is it? Every single being that is occupying this world I would say.

Am I pessimist? Those who know me will say that I’m a very optimistic people. Only occasionally, emotional. Am I pessimist? I can only say, during some rare moments, in the darkness of my room, in the unbearable loneliness, I am. But I will always pull myself out of this dark, lonely atmosphere the next day. Because I hate pity-ness. I am a strong believer that you are what you think, and I simply refuse to think myself as a pessimist, or a loser. The only person, who can decide for your life, is yourself. Do not leave your life to other’s people’s hand. Not only it’s miserable, it’s irresponsible.