I had a dream last night, a bad dream, not a nightmare, just a bad, bad dream.
In my dream, I was driving a car. At first I was driving straight like all the other cars at the road, towards one direction.
Suddenly the scene changed, and I was driving in the opposite direction from other cars. There is car driving towards me but since I’m at the wrong side of the road, I have to sway to prevent being hit by all the cars.
It was difficult trying to control the car while trying to keep away from hitting other cars. But the dream didn’t end there. The last part of my dream was suddenly I was driving towards a large vehicle, like a bulldozer. I manage to sway away from hitting it’s big tyre but then while I was trying to drive away from the big obstables, the bulldozer’s arm (The thing to scope the dirt) come from the sky straight towards my car and I can’t escape it no matter how fast I drive.
And my dream ends with the darkness from above coming down towards me, engulfing me.
I think this dream reflects what is happening right now in my life. In certain part, I’m feeling like I lose control my life. I do not hold the key of my life anymore and I hate this feeling of helplessness. There is a certain part of my life I want to change desperately, or at least get out from it, and I had try but failed. It’s like I walked and dropped into a deep hole. And I try my best to try to climb out from the hole by myself. But without help from the people outside the hole, it seems like I just fall back right into the hole again while trying my hardest to climb out. After falling down countless of time, I’m currently in the “lost hope” state. I’m giving up. I’m tired of trying. Maybe I will stay inside this black hole for god know how many years.