Thursday, September 17, 2009

Down

I never feel so down like today. I'm usually a very optimistic person, but today I feel so down that I plan to just curl up and become a stone and stay inside my bed until the next millennium, not meeting anyone, no need to force myself to smile at them, no need to force myself to talk to them, I don't even want to listen to any voice.

Busy with work until there is no life for me. Everyday work work work and work and more work only. Never ending works. No matter how I fast I work, no matter how fast my fingers clicked on the keyboard, no matter no matter, I still cannot finish my works. I never encountered insomnia before, but can you believe it, I actually had insomnia this week. INSOMNIA, a word that never appear in my dictionary. But now, I am actually having it.

Even before sleeping, all my brain is thinking about work only. And today an incident which happened and basically threaten to crush me to the very sole of my soul. I don't know how to explain it, but I'm beginning to get very tired of my life. I'm beginning to lose hope, beginning to give up hope, beginning to see nothing good about life.

I know I should be happy, because life is short as my Guru always preach. But... Sometimes, there just happens to be a very dark cloud over you, which darken up the whole surrounding, making you suffocating until you wish you can just lose consciousness so that you don't have to feel the pain anymore.

I think I better stop now and curl up and stay inside my bed and let the darkness drown me alive.


5 comments:

Dav DiDi said...

I watch a movie .... she say ... good things happen, we still live, bad things happen, we still have to live with it .. no matter what happens, we still need to face it ... so why not face the day with a smile on your face .. when you smile, not only that you brings comfort to others but indirectly, you will also feeling better .. it works .. trust me ..

someone tell me that i alwayz smile .. no matter what happen .. and when he got a bad day, my smile indirectly comforts him ...

Smile is the key ... :) so jz smile, you never know if you bring some comforts to people ...

Ching Ching said...

cheer up girl...
enjoy your holiday.

Applely said...

I guess most of us face this same situation sometimes in life. I experienced this quite often too.. True, work can never finished no matter how fast i work, no matter how much extra hours i worked, or bring them home to do. No, there is no way it can ever finished up .. Endless due date, rushing, OTs .. Trust me, i do feel miserable too, i do feel so upset, feeling like to give up everything .. But, i admit that we have to face the reality..

When there's no work to do in the office, we might be also worrying abt pay cut or laid off due to company condition..

Add oil .. Gambate ..

JenJen's Place said...

Hi Dear Apple,
Hmm..BEEN there and ALL that I can say is that it will PASS. How about going for jogging or swimming? Usually relax me abit ^_^

OR you can always lash out here in your blog like I did in mine :P

SOFT SOFT HUGS DEAR!!

RaiNboW said...

Dear all, thanks for your words of comfort. I will try my best. =)